Suffer head

I have never understood the human instinct to hunker down in the face of trouble, rather than to fan out.

When most people get into trouble, their first instinct is to withdraw, to hide, to close the curtains and turn out the lights, kill the music and switch off their phones, refuse to answer the door and shut out the world.

When someone gets a cancer diagnosis, they don’t tell anyone – even their children. When people lose their jobs, they keep it away from their friends for as long as they can. When people are going through tough business times, they don’t even tell their staff.

Whether it’s shame, whether it’s not wanting to burden other people, not wanting to look weak and lonesome, or some other kind of fear, people hunker down when they face problems they can’t figure out.

I am sure there is an evolutionary pattern behind that instinct. But whatever that pattern is, it doesn’t make sense in the world we live in today.

There is no situation in the world that I can imagine for which you need to stand alone. Everything is better when there is someone you trust and who cares about you involved; helping you go through it, or just holding your hand when they can’t help you.

There is nothing dignified, strong or beautiful about suffering on your own. 

Unless there is absolutely no one who cares around you, your spirit will be better served if you allow yourself to be human through other humans.